You do realize that by playing into this "butch/femme" dichotomy you are playing into ridiculously oppressive, patriarchal gender roles and there's nothing at all revolutionary about it? Just because your person has a vagina? No. Stop making queers look bad. Also femme ≠ stupid 50s pinup look. Feminine is whatever a woman does, period. In jeans and boots just as much as a dress and (sexist) heels. Our foremothers would be so ashamed of you and the movement you've set back 50 years.
Asked by Anonymous
^^^ my thoughts exactly
what the fuck is up with people policing the hell out of femme-identified people?
Never mind I know exactly what is up :P
"Feminine is whatever a woman does, period."
Tch I love the goal post moving there — nobody’s talking about “feminine” or is fussing about what gender identity somebody’s got. Femme not feminine, sigh.
so a while ago I found this painful video a dude had made of “TOP TEN HOTTEST FEMALE SONIC CHARACTERS!!!” and it’s just a guy talking about which Sonic characters he wants to pork for like TEN MINUTES
my friend took the audio from that video, trimmed it down, and put it over footage of the actual animals along with some smooth jazz and it is still one of the most beautiful things I have ever seen
Also reminder that if you’re in Boston, you can see this and things like this live and in person on a regular basis: https://www.facebook.com/trashnightvideo
I’m really sorry about the lack of updates lately. New features and bug fixes will be made available as soon as I have some free time.
Also, due to an error on my part, I’ve lost asks sent to this blog more than 5 days ago (I accidentally cleaned the whole inbox instead of a side-blog) so if you’ve sent me an ask and did not receive a reply, I would appreciate it if you can send it back if the problem still continues, and I will be replying as soon as possible. I’m terribly sorry about this, and thank you for your patience and understanding.
1) I always tell people who say they don’t “get” Tumblr, “oh, were you not using XKit? yeahhhh…you weren’t actually on Tumblr yet.” It’s a common mistake, totally understandable.
2) The customer service from the XKit Guy will spoil you and shame every company with an actual customer service department
3) As soon as he says he wants a job, I am going to do everything I can to try to get this kid a job, because jeez mccreez.
Asked by Anonymous
I feel like the timing on this is too good for me to not actually address this. I’ve seen this thrown around a few times in various incarnations - either it’s my fault someone decided to find my info and use it to be gross because I put it out there in the first place, or there’s no way anyone could’ve found my number and I must be making it up.
Yes, I did put my phone number out there on the internet. Publicly. On twitter and in a few spreadsheets on google docs.
I did this almost exactly one year ago, during the Boston Marathon bombings.
Having lived in NY during 9/11 was shitty. I was a freshman in highschool. I remember feeling powerless to help or do anything more than trying to contact all my family in the area to see if they were ok. Most of them eventually got back to me. One of them never did. Panic gave way to kind of this dumb numbness while I felt like I had to just watch everything unfold, depersonalized, on TV.
When it started to happen years later while I lived in Boston, I freaked out in a different way. I didn’t want to sit there powerlessly staring at news reports and sending text messages. So I took action - I jumped on twitter and started trying to organize people to go donate blood, to signal boost news (like when I heard a bomb might be down the street from my apartment), and to try and coordinate relief efforts. I put my number and information out there, very publicly, to try and shelter people who were displaced by the bombing and had nowhere to go. I was flailing and trying to help in some way instead of just feeling totally powerless again.
I wasn’t thinking that at the time, someone would have such a massive problem with a woman making a game about depression and would try to use that to scare or intimidate me. Even if I had briefly considered that some creep would get it, I didn’t care. I had more important things to worry about right then.
So yeah, it was reckless. I’m not sorry I did it though, and fuck the narrative of “if you ever make yourself available in any way, you’re responsible for people abusing that”. I am not going to live my life in fear of what unseen people might do with my information. I’m certainly not going to do it in a way that stops me from trying to help people, or from being who I am. *They’re* the ones fucking up by taking vulnerability and using it against someone.
So fuck it.
I hear this line all the time. “You decided to put yourself out there, so it’s your fault people are acting crappy.” That’s the same sort of victim blaming that underscores “having a thicker skin” or saying “that’s just how the Internet is.” That’s a great way to blame everyone but the harasser.
Other things Zoe has done that could be used to harm and harass her:
- make games at all
- have a phone number in the first place
- go out in public ever
- share her opinions with anyone
- even bother forming opinions at all
Criticism of women for making themselves visible and available — a visibility and availability that is in turn exploited by abusive men (and women who have internalized the hatred of women and self-police on behalf of abusive men) — reduces down to “you should have been invisible in order to avoid becoming a target.”
This thinking is itself abusive, and it permits further abuse. The people to question are those exploiting the information of women in order to abuse them. The end.
I once told a joke about a straight person.
They came after me in droves.
Each one singing the same:
Don’t fight fire with fire.
What they mean is: Don’t fight fire with anything.
Do not fight fire with water.
Do not fight fire with foam.
Do not evacuate the people.
Do not sound the alarms.
Do not crawl coughing and choking and spluttering to safety.
Do not barricade the door with damp towels.
Do not wave a white flag out of the window.
Do not take the plunge from several storeys up.
Do not shed a tear for your lover trapped behind a wall of flame.
Do not curse the combination of fuel, heat, and oxygen.
Do not ask why the fire fighters are not coming.
When they say: Don’t fight fire with fire.
What they mean is: Stand and burn.”
here’s another source.
ETA: i’m going to affix my second post here, because this has gone a little viral, without the best sources. bear in mind, my initial discussion of this topic began as a response to props for the denny’s tweet about coachella and its implied wrongs of cultural appropriation.
i did ask everyone to complete further research. thus far, i’m seeing reblogs, but no further comments. c’mon, now. like certain agencies and news outlets, i withheld pertinent information about this case, hoping you jovenes would go find it. no? seriously? why not.
okay. did you find the fact that the head of the DOJ’s civil right’s division, deval l. patrick, remarked at the time, that this was the largest and broadest settlement ever paid under federal public accommodation laws? those were federal laws—not state statutes—enacted over 70 years ago, now, to end segregation in restaurants and other public places serving the public.
so, what actually happened, to bring denny’s to the attention of the DOJ’s civil rights division (and: did you know the DOJ has a civil rights division, with various branches, including housing?).
a majority of the claims came from black customers. this included a black federal judge from houston, traveling with his wife, who was forced to wait nearly an hour—while white patrons were served, and white teens taunted the black couple with the word “n*****.” no one from the staff did a damned thing.
one of the first complaints came in 1991 from a group of 18 young black men, who were asked to pay before service, at a denny’s in san jose, california. the men complied—but they also filed a suit against denny’s.
in 1993 (some articles have the date wrong), 6 uniformed members of president clinton’s u.s. secret service were refused service in Annapolis, by a white waitress, because they were black; meanwhile their white secret service counterparts were seated and served. the black agents filed a complaint—and one denny’s corporate public relations offices obviously couldn’t ignore.
1997 saw the rabid beatings of 6 Asian American students from syracuse university. after the standard treatment of denny’s “wait while we serve the whites,” the students complained to the management and their server, so were forced to leave the restaurant by security called by the manager. the students stated a group of white men then emerged from the restaurant and attacked them while shouting racial slurs. several of the asian students were left unconscious.
what denny’s paid was a class action lawsuit for racial discrimination. claims proven during that case were settled, by any person of color (called a “minority,” in the suit). the overwhelming majority of those who had proven claims were black customers. denny’s clearly had an overall agenda upholding white supremacy.
ironically (and sadly), after the $54.4 million settlement, the restaurant chain went all out to win back its percentage of people of color—especially its former 10% black customer base. their public relations department featured sherman hemsley and isabel sanford, in one television commercial. Fortune magazine selected denny’s as “best company for minorities” in 2001; Black Enterprise gave top space for the chain in their “best companies for diversity,” in 2006 and 2007. read more about the effects of denny’s “grand slam” advertising, by doing some research. seriously *s
now consider why denny’s has its public relations department sending out these bold "calling out" messages, that manage to "raise awareness" about cultural appropriation. even for some of us who are critical of the tweets, there’s the thought that, “it’s not a bad idea.” well, it worked, didn’t it? mm.
I called out their motives the other day, didn’t I?
I said they was apologizing for not letting Black folks eat, lol.
Every time a person or institution appears to be too generous, you have to stop and ask “what are they getting out of this.” Because they are getting something. And shame on Denny’s for thinking PoC can’t see through it.